A Season of Softness: How Faith Restored My Creativity After Postpartum

“God is within her, she will not fall; God will help her at break of day.” Psalm 46:5

After I had my son about two years ago, I felt like creating was dampened as I maneuvered through postpartum. In the background, there was a lot of pressure I was undergoing to push other business efforts outside of my creative work forward. During this period of breastfeeding and healing from birth, I felt suffocated. I always dreamed of cocooning after birth, but it wasn’t like that for me.

By week six, I struggled immensely with being able to handle anxiety. I was flooded with postpartum depression and anxiety. Nothing felt calm except when I would snuggle with my new son. That was amazing, and when I look back on pictures, playing with him brought me the most joy during a season that never let up.

I would discover that I was rebuilding my identity. Pillars of my past self fell off, and I was in a foundation-setting era. With postpartum, I ached for softness in my life but felt pushed to create a more voluptuous version of myself. Instead of leaning into my natural elegance, I felt like I had to perform—be the perfect mother, wife, entrepreneur, and anything else you can think of. It was exhausting, and the more I leaned into perfection and boldness, the less I felt like me.

Then came a second pregnancy, followed by a loss a few months later. My body was screaming at me to slow down, to lay firm boundaries, and God was whispering to me over and over, “Be still” (Psalm 46:10). Psalm 139 appeared in my customized bag given to me at the You Are women’s conference last February (Psalm 139), along with another verse from Isaiah saying, “I am your comforter and protector” (Isaiah 51:12). I remember collapsing in tears at the altar of the church auditorium the first night and sobbing while hands were laid over my back. I finally let go and began to let God.

What would take place over the rest of 2025 and lead up to now was the development of a new identity. This time, I wasn’t remaking or reinventing myself; I was allowing Jesus to take the wheel one day at a time. Faith and hope were being restored through an emotionally treacherous time.

I began archiving certain parts of my life and discarded many items I owned, both donating and finding people who would love or use them. I knew it was an act of faith. God was calling me to take what He’s given me and share—multiply His kingdom and trust that no matter what, He’ll replenish and multiply what I need (Matthew 25:14–30; 2 Corinthians 9:8). Sure enough, He did.

There were many lows throughout this period, and I had to come to terms with letting go of more than I ever thought I would. Another verse appeared as I put more trust in the Lord: “God is with her; she will not fail” (Psalm 46:5). The less I tried to curate myself, the more I was able to hear God’s direction, and my life naturally curated itself.

I’m surrounded right now by softness—soft colors, soft environments, soft people, soft fabrics, soft tones. There is a strength in softness that whispers and doesn’t yell. It’s firm without being harsh or calloused. It’s the beauty of a peony, with layers of petals wrapped around a core. Flowers withstand rain and thunderstorms and still bloom. The era of creativity for me emerged when I stopped trying and allowed myself to lean into softness.

As you move through this next season in your own life, I encourage you to let go and let God, too (Proverbs 3:5–6). It feels scary at first, but what emerges is unlike anything you have ever experienced in the past. It will allow you to rise like an eagle because you have the support of the Holy Spirit (Isaiah 40:31). You, too, will find peace as you find stillness and know that God has got you (Psalm 46:10).